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claw

by sombur

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1.
fears 02:59
mustard yellow screaming you came back in cursive cold brew pensive virtue black belt black shirt black shoes where are your fears? I forget I don't feel now that I'm not worth it where are your fears? I forget I don't feel now that I'm not worth it navy blue impression you came back in full force off script, felt tipped, cuffed jeans i've been such a workhorse searing bright red glisten trepid fury placement latex somber distance how am i not dead yet? where are your fears? I forget I don't feel now that I'm not worth it where are your fears? I forget I don't feel now that I'm not worth it
2.
claw 03:14
somewhere in the harmony patient pretty things candle wax and comforting a hard wood floor synapse and snap and snap and gasp and crack troubled breathing lungs collapse like circus tents more elephants hold tighter on the reins i'm somewhere in the harmonies, blinders off- periphery the guns go off, i bend and buck try to leave but the door's still stuck when everything you wanted felt so close it always does i claw and claw and claw and claw and claw somewhere in the felt i freeze press, dress, mess me up i'm free to hold a pose, a statue of, the men i'll never be days of dishes in the sink i don't have time to feed the cat but i can pet and pet and pet i can laugh and laugh and laugh when everything you wanted felt so close it always does i claw and claw and claw and claw and claw when everything you wanted felt so close it always does i claw and claw and claw and claw and claw
3.
the guiltiest sleep while the guiltiest dream of doing things right every time breakfast, bedhead so sorry, storebought dozen eggs - give way i turn around and say i heard you talking last light circadia hums, fist fight serpent tongues, spider drool you made your home, i tossed around everyone, everyone, everyone decomposed, i watch you now decomposed, i watch you now credits from severything, released July
4.
ecstasy 02:19
evaporating ecstasy next to me everything i used to hide beneath a tattered sequence habit gone generation loss with each and every one generation loss with each and every buried convictions trusted guts snare roll doldrums, caustic ruts i lie awake next to you frantic tomorrow's coming soon what am i gonna do?
5.
hell isnt a place it is a feeling of not knowing where you are or where you're stepping or how far is too far from my parent's house and tether, tangled in wishing "do better" sever several seconds from each exhale domesticate, suffer, suffocate and do it all again again again again everything green and overgrown the things you want, the things you own everything, that's green and overgrown the things you have, the things you own everything green and overgrown the things you want, the things you own everything, that is green and overgrown green and overgrown, green and overgrown sever several seconds from each exhale domesticate, suffer, suffocate and do it all again again again again
6.
miss america 03:58
like miss america mortar and pestle louisville slugger against my ribs turn and pivot bend me over louisville slugger against my ribs everyone i've ever loved tasted poison, turned to doves 12 gauge skeet shot, won't you stay? I'll destroy us, i'll destroy us it's better off this way
7.
public pool 03:32
waking up from almost drowning public pool now everyone's smiling a thousand half filled balloons fall from the ceiling newspaper confetti, "thanks for surviving" another day, of mostly cursed receipt paper, filed in your purse diet soda, low fat milk you picked your poison you picked your risk you picked your risk you picked your i don't know when i started feeling under floorboards, under meanings co-dependence, start receding slash burn farming, so much freeing so much freeing

about

i don't even know anymore

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released November 3, 2018

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sombur Ypsilanti, Michigan

if you leak this you're not my friend anymore

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